Cycles do what they do best: repeat.
So naturally, it only makes sense that we expect the same thing to happen when we notice the patterns of a cycle repeating itself.
But just as we can play along with the cycle—the role we’ve always known to play in it—we can also disrupt the cycle.
We can decide not to participate in it, to change a thought around it, or take different actions. That alone is often enough to break free from the cycle.
Although this may be hard at first, there will come a moment when your soul may come bursting forth asking you to do the thing your brain is convinced can’t be done: disrupt the cycle.
Yet, outside of what your brain believes, one thing remains true—your expectations are just ideas around something. Ideas can be challenged and changed to reach a different outcome or to shift a perspective. And when we grant ourselves the chance to shift, we grant our lives the chance to shift with it.
Having boundaries, standards, and goals are often great things to define. This way you know where to focus your attention from one day to the next.
But, when you find that your life has been on a hamster wheel for the last decade, or that your heart has been closed off to love for how painful the last romance was, you find that even the goals you’ve set for yourself may somehow still be unattainable because you’re still expecting the same cycle to unfold.
To attain the thing you are imagining, however, takes you releasing your expectation of it. This can sound like:
- “I’ll get my heart broken again if I open up”
- “I can’t trust people; each time I do, I get disappointed”
- “There’s no point in caring because the same thing will probably happen again”
- “At least I’m used to betrayal”
- “Being soft is a weakness”
- “Vulnerability is for the weak”
- “I can’t trust community”
- “Depending on others sounds like a recipe for disaster. I know because I’ve seen it!”
The list could go on. But what happens when we release these expectations of heartache, hardship, and suffering? Especially when it comes to connecting with people or exploring new life paths?
Let’s reframe some of these old expectations:
Suffering / fear-based expectations
- “I’ll get hurt again if I open up.”
- “I can’t trust people; each time I do, I get disappointed.”
- “There’s no point in caring because the same thing will probably happen again.”
- “At least I’m used to betrayal.”
- “Being soft is a weakness.”
- “Vulnerability is for the weak.”
- “I can’t trust community.”
- “Depending on others sounds like a recipe for disaster. I know because I’ve seen it!”
Expansion / love-centered revisions
- “Opening up can bring many blessings!”
- “People can be trustworthy. I trust people to be who they are.”
- “Because I care, I know things can be different.”
- “I’ll willing to explore being supported.”
- “My softness is a superpower!”
- “Being vulnerable helps me feel strong and authentic to myself!”
- “I know that there are people out there that want to love and support me.”
- “Because I know I can depend on myself, I know that there are others I can depend on, too.”
Breaking cycles, curses, and old ways isn’t easy, but it’s 100% possible. The fruit you may bare from it may be greater than any garden you’ve ever seen.
So tend to your garden, plant new fruits, water what needs nourishment, be gracious with yourself, and allow yourself to unravel in a new direction.
A change of thought is all you need to start.
It’s time to break those cycles, so let yourself do it.
Happy May 2024 new moon.
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EcoWell Co. 